how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
