help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
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