it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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