you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Randomize
