I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
