I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
