well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Randomize
