omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
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