just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Randomize
