do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
