i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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