Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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