omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
