brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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