I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize