VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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