bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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