I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Randomize
