He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
