well you can't waste a boner
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
