nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
