Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
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