Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
