Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I checked into jail on foursquare
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
