dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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