I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
