I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
