Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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