seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
