I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize