mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I'm having to shit out rocks
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
