operation harelip BJ is a go
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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