I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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