trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
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