Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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