Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
