hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize
