Small penises have feelings too.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
