I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize
