They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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