For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
