I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
i love accidental penises.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
