I love black thongs
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
