I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
