my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
