we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
