Just mADE A PArabola og urine
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
My balls are so social today.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
