omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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