It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
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