I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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