Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Randomize
