I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize